Anything

Well here we are....June. Very nearly half way through the year. I didn't know if I would be back at writing...actaully I still don't know if I am. But right now my heart is burning and my fingers are itching. I have something to say. To you, to God maybe even to myself.

Many of you know our journey over the past five and a half years, it hasn't been an easy one nor very glamorous. I don't know anyone that would think having 35c in your bank account is very glamourous.

 Five and a half years our lives change in an instant but our journey started long before that. It started when together we prayed an "Anything" prayer. Together Jamie and I prayed one of those totally "you must be crazy" kind of prayers and offered up our lives to God to do with what he pleased. He says and we do.  We did not want to keep living a normal faith kind of life but we wanted to lead a life by faith in a God so powerful, so tremendous, so all-encompassing, so mind-blowing, so loving, so magnificent. Thus our "beautiful crazy faith" life was born. For our children it meant they were in for the ride as well.

Fast forward to now and what a ride its been. I have just finished reading a book called "Anything" by Jennie Allen who too along with her family prayed an 'Anything' prayer.  Every single thought, feeling, fear, worry high and low that she shared I could resonate with so deeply. She and I could be friends, good friends.

These years have seen some all time lows, some deep dark valleys that I wondered how we would get back up from.  We have experienced some exhilarating highs that are beyond words and seen God move in such miraculous ways like we had never seen before. We have been stretched WAY out of our comfort zone and have been used by God in extraordinary ways.  I have never felt such love and intimacy with God nor have I ever felt such confusion and sorrow within that.

The question remains...Is it worth it? My answer...A definite YES! Has is been easy? No way, in fact its been the hardest years we have faced but they have been the best years also. We have grown so much but we also have been shown that we understand little about our Almighty God.  Writing such lines so truthful as these does cause me to wonder if I am selling a 'beautiful crazy faith' to anyone. Perhaps you who are reading leave thinking "um yay for you but no thanks...that sounds way too hard"   I am sorry as thats not my intention but I am not about to paint a all round rosy picture when it hasn't been.

Truthfully lately it has been hard, ridiculously hard....I can do nothing but to press into my Saviour and praise Him, for He is good. I certainly don't understand His ways but I love Him and trust in Him will all of my being. And I keep on going.

"For My thought are not your thoughts. Nor your way My ways" declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth so are MY ways higher than your ways And My thoughts than your thoughts" -  Isaiah 55:9

Many a songs are on my play list at the moment and I have numerous of favourites (can they all be favourites? )  But I found a life motto inside one of them.....Six words that basically sum up my heart, spirit, soul and what our life by faith is all about.